To the Dreamers

"To the dreamers wide eyed believers, hanging on to hope by a thread.

To the soulful, high up and hopeful, keep on charging ahead!

Cause, when you feel it, once you see it, and you breath it, it's unforgettable.

When you know it, once you know it, and you hold it its unforgettable..."

-For King and Country "To the Dreamers"

October 10th, 2019: I attended a For King and Country concert the fall of my junior year of high school. I was coming off of a hard summer battling depression and spiritual attack. I was grasping at straws in my academic life, trying to find my purpose, because suddenly the plan I had so long held on to seemed so entirely wrong. I felt like I lacked direction in the clubs I was working with, despite so badly wanting to make a difference. I was heartbroken, and crying out to God to change my perspective, to restore my hope and help me relinquish the choke-hold grip of control I was trying to have over my life.

I was the dreamer, hanging on to hope by a thread, wondering if charging ahead was worth it.

For those of you that followed me on Instagram at the time, you saw my post and know that God did exactly that: He showed up and filled me with His peace that surpasses all understanding. He reminded me that I need to give up control, trust in Him, leave behind my mistakes, and open my heart to the joy that He wanted me to receive; that I am priceless, prayed for, and worth pursuing.

This concert came exactly when I needed it to, and propelled me forward into the rest of the year as I opened my heart up to whatever the Lord had planned for me.

October 10th, 2021: Two years to the day, I attended For King and Country for the second time as a freshman in college. I now have a job with the ministry I prayed for direction with, my broken heart has healed, the Lord has carried me through waves of spiritual attack, and brought me people to help me through the hard times. I let go. It wasn't easy, and the Lord's plan did look completely different from mine. I still have to remind myself daily who is really in control here, but God showed me why charging ahead is worth it because what He had planned for me was so much greater than anything I had even stopped to consider.

I am a big fan of things "coming full circle". I think my inner story teller likes seeing a clear beginning and end to things, with plenty of poetic justice along the way. Which is why I was so completely floored by the realisation that these two events happened exactly two years apart. I don't point out this growth and difference in my life to make my life look like I have it all together, because believe me, I don't.

I share this to tell you to keep going.

Life may seem hard right now, like there is no point in having hope. Maybe you, much like I was, are the broken dreamer. And if that is the case then let me be the first to tell you: don't stop dreaming.

Because there is a God who loves you immeasurably more than you can ever imagine, who looks at your mess and says "give it to me". Who will never view you as unwanted or broken. Who has the most beautiful and intentional plan for your life, the minute you are willing to let Him in. And once you believe it, once you feel it, it will be unforgettable.

I write a lot about our purpose in life, as both individuals and believers, and I truly don't think this blog would exist had God not shown me that our "purpose" may not be exactly what we think it is. That the first step to uncovering the Lord's plan our life, is relinquishing our plan for our lives and giving up control. In 2019, I had plans to become a lawyer, and was realising that nothing about that brought me joy. But it was "the plan" I argued, and I had to realise that if that was what God intended for me to be, then He would also equip me with the strength and joy that I needed to pursue that.

In 2021, I am not studying law, I am pursuing writing and ministry - the passion the Lord had instilled in me since I was a little girl typing away at my mom's old desktop computer. But, the Lord didn't reveal that until I said, "your will, not mine". So, you want to find your purpose in life? Give the plan to the Lord, He has the original blue print anyways!

I drove to work yesterday with a smile on my face, when I used to wake up with a frown that didn't leave me till I got home at the end of the day. Growth happens and life keeps going.

Life is composed of hills and valleys, and as Christians, it is guaranteed that we will experience both of these in life. Ecclesiastes 3:1 tells us that "there is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens" but seasons are called "seasons" for a reason - they are temporary, and soon, you will reach a new high.

This post feels relatively simple in comparison to other things I've written, but sometimes I think it's the simple things that are most important. I just needed to brag on God this week, because I would be amiss if I didn't tell you how unfathomably great my God's love is. That broken dreamers can still dream, and when those dreams come from the Creator of the Universe, they are so much sweeter.

Here is to charging ahead...

-Emma

"Be fearless in pursuit of what sets your soul on fire."